I was expecting more stats, numbers and psychology. Instead this was more of an ode to kink, which is fine, but given the title, I expected an analysis of psychological cause or social analysis. The author did a beautiful job of making kinks sound appealing and does a beautiful job of being fair and honest, but it was more literary love and less hard science. I was looking for the hard science. That being said, there's a few good quotes and/or ideas listed below.
- "In my rape fantasies, I'm not expected to be concerned with my partner's pleasure and there's liberation in that, too. The social contract, along with my body and dignity, has been broken, so I owe him nothing. Obviously, considering a partner's pleasure is a worthwhile goal and a necessary part of intimacy, and yet, an experience where you don't have to consider your partner's pleasure relieves you of the pressure to prioritize it."
And most importantly! These perfectly well written rules!
- "When making your way through the play space, be aware of the energy you project onto others' scenes. ... If you wish to watch a scene, keep a respectful and safe distance from the players. Do not crowd scenes while watching and do not join scenes without consent. Do not interfere in any scene without the prior permission of the players or touch any equipment that is not your own. I appreciated this protocol because sometimes parties will say, 'Just don't be an asshole.' Which I have found is not a deterrent for malicious or naïve assholes whatsoever."
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