Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving - Pete Walker

 This is a super amazing book that everyone should probably read, even if they're like me and don't have any PTSD, complex or not.  I've seen flashes of the consequences of this in people around me. Often it manifests as someone freaking out over simple life hiccups, but the types of reactions I see line up with the patterns outlined in this book. (Everyone has innate reactions that come out in response to external stimuli regardless of if they have any PTSD or not, and that is what I mean when I say I see them.  The book outlines them very well, so it's easier to catch them in everyday life. cPTSD draws out these reactions more as they've been cemented into place over a long period of time.) I think this book would really help people understand both their own sudden, emotional reactions and those of people around them, leading to better understanding and, hopefully, more successful communication and better relationships.  Identifying how/why someone responds a certain way to conflict, in my opinion, would benefit everyone because those responses could be anticipated and dealt with in a healthier manner. 

The Gospel of Thomas: New Perspectives on Jesus' Message - Elaine Pagels

 A super interesting look at why Thomas wasn't canonized and how, honestly, I think we missed out. 

Sold - Patricia McCormick

 This was off a "banned book" list and was one I hadn't seen before, likely because it appears to be a newer book published after I left high school.  It was not a happy story, but I still liked it.  I liked the way it was written. It was sectioned off into chapters that were sort of like diary entries in that some were super short because there wasn't much to say about the topic.  I do kinda wish it was a little longer and showed the MC's healing process. 

Reaper at the Gates - Sabaa Tahir (Ember in the Ashes, Bk. 3)

 These books keep me guessing a little bit and I like that. They have great pace and aren't afraid to kill off major characters. They are fun and I would recommend them to people who enjoy a good "fight for all of humanity" story. 

Devil in the Dollhouse - Richard Kadrey (Sandman Slim, Bk. 3.5)

 More of a short story, but I like it. It adds depth. 

Battle Ground - Jim Butcher (Dresden Files, Bk. 17)

 Hot dayum! I do love me some apocalypse!  And smashing the shit outta bad guys! This one has lots of both from very beginning to end. Whooo weeee! Can't wait to see the attempted clean up!  That'll be entertaining. 

I was NOT prepared for the level of emotional damage in this book!

Song of Susannah - Stephen King (The Dark Tower, Bk. 6)

 I took a big, long break from Stephen King, but I'm glad I came back with this one. I love how meta King is in some of his books, but this one really takes the cake. LOVE it! This was a great book, assuming you liked the others in the series. 

I, The Jury - Mickey Spillane (The Mike Hammer Collection, Bk. 1)

 I know it's old, but this was just completely ridiculous. The MC is needlessly violent and weak-willed, he just fucks everything. His response to any kind of wall, or setback, or stubborn person who doesn't immediately tell him what he wants to know is to threaten to beat them up and then they just cave? Does the author seriously think the world works that way? He just runs around and kills several people but because he's a police liscenced PI, it's ok. They just let him go on his merry way. What even? 

Solving the mystery was convoluted and didn't really make much sense, yet despite the "why" being out of reach the "bad guy" was super obvious from the very beginning. This book was bad! Just absurd.

The Whisper Man - Alex North

 This one was a recommendation from another writer, so I was honestly expecting a little more. The story was ok, the writing was ok, the pace was ok, the "surprise" was ok.  Overall, the whole book was just ok.

Don't Know much about History: Everything you need to know about American history but never learned - Kenneth C. Davis

I think I know a fair bit about American history. I did fairly well in my HS American history class and have been reading more detailed accounts of various events since then, but a general refresher never hurt.  This book also included recent history that had not yet occurred when I was still in high school, so it details events I experienced but having them all put together in a single timeline really puts them into perspective.  At the time, I did not realize how impactful much of those lived experiences would be.  It also goes over the 80's in much detail, which generally got left out of history books because it was too recent to get to in class, but too far for me to remember/experience. Regan really was an awful man! Jeeze!  I would recommend this book to anyone, young or old, either because you will soon encounter this stuff in class and having a slight head start always helps or because I know you don't remember much from your history class.  

Some notes I took from this book: 

"America has always had a love affair with simple solutions to complex problems. Indians on good land? Move 'em out! You want Texas? Start a war with Mexico! Crime problem? Bring back the death penalty! Prayer in schools will solve the moral lapse in the nation! Bussing school children will end racial segregation. The solutions always seem so simple when politicians proclaim them. Masses take up the cry and laws are passed with an outpouring of irresistible popular support. The problem is that these broad solutions rarely work the way they are supposed to." (section discussing the 18th Amendment) Does that sound familiar?

"The easy-going rules of the day meant that investors only had to put down 10-20% in cash to buy stock. The rest was available on cheap credit. The Federal Reserve fed the frenzy with artificially low interest rates set by old-line republicans beholden only to their corporate pals. The banks loaned millions to feed speculative schemes. The American public was in enormous debt and their 'wealth' was all on paper." (section discussing the Great Depression) Does that sound familiar?

"Although people thought of the 1990's as the decade of economic prosperity, 11 states experienced increased poverty. In terms of weekly wages, census data showed that most gains were made by those already earning the most with the lower wage-earners making much smaller gains. In other words, the rising tide lifted all boats, but some boats were lifted a little higher. Or as one of the pigs in George Orwell's Animal Farm put it, "All animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others." Most shocking of all was the fact that child poverty remains one of America's most stunning failures. Overall, the nation's official child poverty rate fell to 16%, which is still above the lows of the late 1960's and 1970's when it was around 14%. Even with reduced childhood poverty, the United States lags behind most other wealthy nations. America's poorest children have a lower standard of living that those in the bottom 10% of any other (industrialized) nation except Britain. And in a country whose political leadership routinely said, "No child will be left behind." American infant mortality rates ranks 33rd in the world, only slightly better than Cuba's.   18% of women in America received no prenatal care. 14% of children have no medical care." (PS: I believe this was written before the ACA was enacted and I would like to know if these stats are still accurate. As of 2020, America ranked 33/37 in infant mortality. As of 2021: 6.3% of women didn't get prenatal care, 5.0% of children don't have insurance healthcare. The US is currently ranked 64/186 in maternal mortality, the lowest of any first world nation.)

A Man Called Ove - Fredrik Backman

 This story begins with a grumpy Swedish man who is rather unlikable.  I immediately saw parallels with Leif Persson's Backstrom and I was very worried I'd stumbled into another awfully written MC.  I am happy to report that was not the case by the end. Based on the settings, I figured it had to be a redeeming story arc and the fact that it was such a popular book made my believe this more.  I know there are many shitty books that get to the bestsellers list or that are required reading in school, but the potential redemption arc seemed so obvious that I knew it had to be good.  It was. This was a well-written, heart-warming story and I would really recommend it to anyone who enjoys rooting for character growth and a realistic setting. 

The V Games - K. Webster, Ker Dukey

 As far as romance novels go, I thought this one was pretty good. It didn't feel like the "plot" was just to get to the next sex scene. It felt like an actual story where they don't fade to black for the sex scenes.  Therefore, the story itself was quite good and the characters honestly well thought out.  I'd recommend this book to people that enjoy sexy writing but also a good story. 

Beyond the Wand: The Magic & Mayhem of Growing Up a Wizard - Tom Felton

 An interesting read. A very kind and honest look behind the scenes of a young actor without all the ego. It was interesting and I'd recommend it for Harry Potter fans.

Side note: looks like Tom is a sub. "All of a sudden, there was a rigorous structure to my day. I realized that I'd missed that. Throughout my childhood, on the Harry Potter set, I'd had structure imposed upon me without really knowing it. I was told when to turn up, where to stand, where to look, what to say.  There is something calming about that kind of certainty." lol

Old School - Tobias Wolff

 This is a book written for literary types by a literary type. A whole story about writing full of unconventional words. It's ok, but I wouldn't recommend it, nor would I give it an award, but apparently some think otherwise. 

A Torch Against the Night - Sabaa Tahir (Ember in the Ashes, Bk. 2)

 I'm not in love with this series, but it still kept me guessing a few times and I like that. I'd still recommend this series for the fantasy lover. 

The Getaway God - Richard Kadrey (Sandman Slim, Bk. 6)

 The more of these I read, the more I love them. I highly recommend this series for anyone who loves a gritty, wild ride.  This book smacks hard of Hellblazer, if John Constantine were a Nephilim. I love the author's quips and how he gives the MC a "fuck-all" attitude within reason, not just randomly doing stupid shit like so many lesser writers. 

Stranger in a Strange Land - Robert A. Heinlein

There is so much theology and philosophy going on in this book that I don't know if I could properly sum it up or explain it. I'll leave some quotes below that I really liked from the book to outline some of the concise finer points.  

Beyond those quotes, I am, as has always been the case so far, confused in that the old sci-fi writers got so much right in terms of technology, but still can't fucking figure out a female character. It's baffling considering the tech they make up and guess about is often not too far from the truth today 120-80 years after the books were written, but the living, breathing humans right in front of the authors, that they often share a home with, seem to escape their understanding. 

1)  "My folks tried to make a preacher of me. I guess it shows." 

"It does."

"Don't scoff, girl! I woulda made a good one if I hadn't fallen into the fatal folly of reading. With a touch more confidence and a liberal helping of ignorance, I would have been a famous evangelist." 

2)  "Let's see your credentials, and show them to the Fair Witness and state loud and clear your name, rank, organization and pay number."

"You know who I am! I have a warrant."

"I have a warrant to part your hair with a shotgun unless you do things legally and in order. I don't know who you are! You look like a stuffed shirt I saw over the telephone. But I don't identify you. You must identify yourself in specified fashion World Code paragraph 1602 part 2 before you may serve a warrant. And that goes for those other apes too.  And that pithican parasite piloting for you."

"They are police officers acting under my orders."

"I don't know that they are. You might have hired those ill-fitting clown suits at a costumers. The letter of the law, sir. You've come barging into my castle. You say you are a police officer and you allege that you have a warrant for this intrusion. But I say you are trespassers until you prove otherwise, which invokes my sovereign right to use force to eject you which I shall start to do in about 3 seconds."

"I wouldn't advise it."

"Why are you to advise? If I am hurt in attempting to do this, my right, your action becomes constructive assault with a deadly weapon if the things those mules are toting are guns, as they appear to be. Civil and criminal, both! Why, my man, I'll have your hide for a door mat."

3) "Quit squirming your carcass at him, you cheap hussy!"

4) "God wants us to be happy. He filled the world with things to make us happy.  Would God let grape juice turn to wine if he didn't want us to drink and be joyful? He could let it stay grape juice, or turn it into vinegar that no one could get a giggle out of. Ain't that true? Of course, that don't mean you should get roaring drunk and neglect your wife and beat your kids. He gave us good things to use, not abuse... And it make you want to dance and give thanks to the Lord for his goodness, why not? God made alcohol and God made feet. He made them so you could put them together and be happy... And that ain't all. If God didn't want women to be looked at, he woulda made them ugly. That's reasonable, isn't it? God isn't a cheat. He set up the game himself. He wouldn't rig it so the marks can't win like a flat-joint wheel . . . He wouldn't send anybody to Hell for loosing in a crooked game. Alright! God wants us to be happy, and he told us how: Love one another! Love a snake if the poor thing needs love! Love thy neighbor! And the back of your hand only to Satan's corruptors who only want to lead you away from the appointed way and down into the pit. And by love, he didn't mean namby-pamby old maid love that's scared to look up from the hymn book for fear of seeing a temptation of the flesh.  If God hated flesh, why did he make so much of it? God is no sissy. He made the Grand Canyon and comets coursing through the sky and cyclones and stallions and earthquakes. Can a God who can do all that turn around and practically wet his pants just because some little Sheela leans over a might and a man catches the sight of a tit? You know better, hon, and so do I. When God told us to love, he wasn't holding out a card on us, he meant it! . . . Of course, that don't mean to peddle it any more than a bottle of rye means I gotta get fighting drunk and clobber a cop. You can't sell love, and you can't buy happiness. No price tags on either. And if you think there is, the way to Hell lies open. But if you give with an open heart and receive what God has an unlimited supply of, the devil can't touch you."

5) "Jealousy is a disease. Love is a healthy condition. The immature mind often mistakes one with the other, or assumes the greater the love, the greater the jealousy. In fact, they are almost incompatible. One emotion hardly leaves room for the other. Both at once can produce unbearable turmoil."

Peace Talks - Jim Butcher (The Dresden Files, Bk. 16)

 This is the first "To Be Continued..." book by Butcher in this series, and I'm ok with it!  Looking forward to the next. 

Backstrom: He who Kills the Dragon - Leif GW Persson

More than a few years ago, some network made this story into a tv show. It only ran 1 season, but I thought it was pretty great. Therefore, the book had been on my radar for some time. I am very disappointed to report that the book was horrid. I honestly can't think of how the author could make a more unlikeable MC. Even awful MCs like Joe from You or Rick from Rick and Morty have moments where you can at least understand where they are coming from.  This book fails to make you cheer anything the MC does, whether in the name of good or bad. I live in fear of making my characters this bad. 

The Origin of Satan - Elaine Pagels

 This book was both fascinating and boring at the same time. There is a whole hell of a lot going on here! The modern church seems to skirt around so much of the history from about 0-300 CE, and reading this book, it's pretty obvious why. Everyone was flailing around and coming up with crazy stuff and apparently no one knew what was going on. I think knowing the history of the early Christian church is paramount to understanding how we got to where we are today. Some of the sketchy inclusion/exclusion texts from this era also make more sense when you observe the total chaos that was the first few centuries of Christianity. 

I think this book would have been more impactful if it had been boiled down to about half its size. It dragged on for a long time that wasn't really relevant to the titled topic. 

Operation Nemesis: The Assassination Plot that avenged the Armenian Genocide - Eric Bogosian

 This is a seriously intense book! It starts out detailing the mass murders of the Armenian genocide (see final note below), then moves onto the Armenians seeking revenge because many of the men responsible were not held accountable (and were even making plans to rule Turkey again), then goes into details about some of the trials of the assassins. Every step of the way is just crazy. I completely support today's Armenians holding onto their resentment because Turkey still has yet to take responsibility for what they did. 

Although my favorite tidbit was when the German lawyers made a big deal about how abhorrent what the Ottomans did and how no respectable European country would ever whole-sale slaughter a religious minority . . . said in 1923. 

Other Notes:

There is a prime example of "When Women Refuse" at the beginning of this story. "According to the 5th century historian, Agath Angelos, 37 Christian virgins fleeing Roman persecution arrived in Trdat's kingdom (pagan Armenian king) during Gregory's imprisonment (famous Christian monk). The king lusted after one of the virgin nuns, Hripsime, a renowned beauty. Hripsime had, of course, taken a vow of chastity, so she resisted Trdat's advances. In a rage, the king tortured and killed Hripsime. Then martyred the entire flock of young virgin nuns."

"On the same day she (one of the Christian missionary women) wrote: In [the city], the women were gathered together and killed. The men had been killed earlier. The women were ordered to remove their best clothes and they were laid on top of each other, 2 by 2 and beheaded."

Cod: A Biography of the Fish that changed the World - Mark Kurlansky

 This is a super cool book for anyone who like marine biology, history, economics, or just weird facts. 

"Whatever steps are taken, one of the greatest obstacles to restoring cod stocks off the coast of Newfoundland is an almost pathological collective denial of what has happened. Newfoundlanders seem prepared to believe anything other than that they have killed off nature's bounty. One Canadian journalist published an article pointing out that cod disappeared from Newfoundland at about the same time that stocks started rebuilding in Norway. Clearly, the northern stock had packed up and migrated to Norway. Man wants to see nature and evolution as separate from human activities. There's the natural world and there is man. But man also belongs to the natural world. If he's a ferocious predator, that too is a part of evolution. If cod and haddock and other species cannot survive because man kills them, then something more adaptable will take their place. Nature, the ultimate pragmatist, doggedly searches for something that works."

I see so many parallels with this simple passage and people in denial about global climate change. 

Kill City Blues - Richard Kadrey (Sandman Slim Series, Bk. 5)

 I feel like this series is really hitting its stride now.  Looking forward to more. 

Sula - Toni Morrison

 This was obviously one of those books that they make you read in school and it just sucks.  It's about boring, do-nothing people and their meaningless lives.  It emphasizes the crude, cruel, baseness of people and life and just makes you feel bad about having read it. If this book disappeared from the world, there wouldn't be any great loss. Don't waste your time. 

Artemis - Andy Weir

 This is a very fun book. The story is not terribly complicated but I still liked it! I LOVED how much effort the author put into the realities of living and working on the moon! As far as sci-fi goes, this is the very top of the pile in my opinion.  It was so well thought out! It was a fun book but still seemed absolutely realistic.  I highly recommend this book to anyone who likes fiction, because it perfectly straddles the line between realistic and fantasy. 

Dept. of Speculation - Jenny Offill

 The author's surname really does give you insight about the quality of this book. It truly was awful. I can honestly say this is the worst book I've read since beginning this blog. I thought about putting it down several times, and the only reason I finished it was because it was so short. The story sucked, the characters barely existed, the writing style was mostly unfulfilling and occasionally grating. Just horrid. No one should ever read this book.  I'm mad someone recommended it on the internet. 

An Ember in the Ashes - Sabaa Tahir (Ember in the Ashes, Bk. 1)

 This was a pretty good book and I look forward to reading the rest in the series.  I appreciated the diversity of cultures mentioned in the book.  The author wasn't too heavy handed or obvious.  Good story, good pacing, good style.  I'm looking forward to the next.