Thursday, November 11, 2021

Mindset: The New Psychology of Success - Carol Dweck

 While a very insightful and important view on the psychology of success in human, let me save you some hassle and give you the key points of this book so you can spend your time reading something more nuanced. 

There are 2 ways of looking at the world which the author has termed fixed and growth.  People are largely pushed into one or the other based on their upbringing, but can change them naturally and without notice over time or by actively trying to restructure their thinking. The fixed mindset is based about the idea that either you are smart and "get it" or you are not.  

A fixed mindset person believes everything should be easy because it comes to them naturally, or they will never get whatever "it" is.  It is a "that's just how the world is" view.  They dislike change and do not feel they have control of many aspects in their lives.  It dictates that only you can accomplish what you want and inclines people to take responsibility for a whole project, even when others were involved.  

A growth mindset person believes everything takes hard work and nothing comes naturally.  They believe every one and thing has a potential for change, and view the world as a challenge to overcome. Teamwork is appreciated and not seen as a problem but an opportunity to get new insight and ideas. 

When laid out in this format, it seems obvious how the fixed mindset could hinder someone's goal accomplishment and growth, but in real life, it is deceptively difficult to pick out.  An example I see regularly in my daily life:  I have red hair and get complimented on its shade often.  The fixed mindset is that I have this hair color and I have somehow earned it.  All the complements due to me boost my personal worth.  So what happens when my hair goes grey? All the self-worth I've derived from it goes too.  Now typically my response to these complements is, "Oh thanks! But it just kinda happened."  Even before reading this book, I realized the need to complement people on something they have done, achieved or chosen.  I am lucky to have this hair experience show me the importance of focusing on what people have done in a natural way, instead of things that were luck/chance.  I make it a point to complement people on colors or fits of clothing that the chose, or hairstyles instead of hair type, smart moves in a game or witty comments.  All of these kind of complements address the growth mindset, things people can change and actively work on, instead of things we can't change.  This is exactly what the book encourages.  There is one additional aspect of these complements that I was subject to growing up and it actively pushed me into a fixed mindset as a child.  I have worked hard to get out of it and, thanks to this book, now consciously make an effort to not say the same to any children I'm around.  I was often told growing up, "Oh you're so smart!" But society's implication is people are born smart or not, so there's nothing to change that, and therefore complementing a child this way puts them into that fixed mindset and when they have an academic problem they can't overcome, they begin to doubt their own intelligence.  I now make an effort to to say things more along the lines of, "Oh wow! You got an A? You must have worked very hard to get that!" Which subconsciously tells the child that effort will get results (Not always true, but it frames working hard in a positive way instead of meaning if you don't get it instantly, you're not good enough and never will be).  Oh, and this is true for adults too, but typical in more subtle ways. 

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